I'm a cnn.com / msnbc.com junkie and find all kinds of strange, maddening, or otherwise unbelievable articles. Others are just plain interesting. As often as I'm on, however, people still ask me, "did you hear about ______", and I somehow missed that story.
Post any articles you find that you find interesting - I'd suggest copying the entire article instead of just the link. Comments on articles welcome.
'Meet the Parents' actress dead at 31
Friday, March 11, 2005 Posted: 10:14 AM EST
LOS ANGELES, California (AP) -- Actress Nicole DeHuff, who memorably took a volleyball in the face from Ben Stiller in the 2000 hit movie "Meet the Parents," died of complications from pneumonia. She was 31.
DeHuff had twice visited a hospital shortly before her death February 16 but was sent home both times, the E! Network's E! Online Web site reported Friday.
"Meet the Parents" was DeHuff's first film. A bumbling Stiller, who is dating her sister, accidentally breaks her nose during a volleyball game on the eve of her wedding. The action is one of many that estrange Stiller from DeHuff's menacing father, played by Robert De Niro.
The actress also appeared in the films "Suspect Zero" and "See Arnold Run" and had a starring role in the recently completed movie "Unbeatable Harold," which was directed by her husband, Ari Palitz.
She had a regular role in the 2002 TV series "The Court" and appeared on such other shows as "CSI: Miami," "Without a Trace," "Dragnet," "The Practice" and "Monk."
The Oklahoma native earned a bachelor's degree in drama from Carnegie Mellon University in Pittsburgh before moving to Los Angeles.
2 former N.Y. cops charged as Mafia hit men
Friday, March 11, 2005 Posted: 1:29 PM EST
NEW YORK (CNN) -- Two former New York City police detectives face a federal court hearing in Las Vegas, Nevada, on Friday after being indicted on murder charges for allegedly acting as hit men for the Mafia more than 20 years ago.
According to the indictment from a federal grand jury in Brooklyn that was unsealed Thursday, Stephen Caracappa and Louis Eppolito routinely passed confidential law enforcement information to the mob and killed rival gangsters.
The indictment alleges that the men's association with organized crime began in the early 1980s, when they started passing along information to high-ranking members and associates of the Luchese crime family, disclosing the identities of numerous cooperating witnesses and compromising several state and federal investigations.
Caracappa was a member of the New York Police Department's Organized Crime Homicide Unit, which he helped found. In his duties, he filled the role of gatekeeper for information about Mafia killings,The Associated Press reported.
Roslynn Mauskopf, U.S. attorney for the Eastern District of New York, described the men's actions as "a stunning betrayal of their shields, their colleagues and the citizens they were sworn to protect.
"For years, they were on retainer with the mob, they were paid handsomely for participating directly and indirectly in the murders and attempted murders of 11 individuals."
Among the charges against Caracappa and Eppolito are eight murders, two attempted murders and murder conspiracy.
Both men were placed on the payroll of Luchese family underboss Anthony "Gaspipe" Casso in 1987 and received $4,000 a month for acting as moles, prosecutors allege. In 1992, Caracappa and Eppolito accepted a $65,000 contract to eliminate Eddie Lino, a Gambino family captain whom Casso believed was involved in an attempt on his life, the indictment says.
Prosecutors also accuse Caracappa and Eppolito of having a role in the murders of three other men Casso believed tried to kill him. The duo also is charged in other killings.
Eppolito is the author of a book titled "Mafia Cop." In the autobiography, he describes how he turned away from the "family business" to become what he described as one of the police department's most-decorated officers.
Eppolito has had small roles in several films, including the 1990 mob feature "GoodFellas" in which he played "Fat Andy."
According to federal investigators, the former detectives still have mob ties.
New York Police Commissioner Raymond Kelly said, "this shocking, disgraceful conduct demands prosecution to the fullest extent of the law."
Caracappa and Eppolito are each charged with eight murders, two attempted murders, one murder conspiracy, obstruction of justice, drug distribution and money laundering, according to a written statement issued by the U.S. attorney's office, Kings County district attorney's office, Drug Enforcement Administration and FBI.
If convicted, they could face a maximum sentence of life in prison.
Caracappa and Eppolito were charged with drug distribution and money laundering in Las Vegas, where they were arrested Wednesday night. They retired to Las Vegas several years ago.
For more than 10 years, authorities had suspected the men of Mafia involvement but lacked evidence. According to court documents, prosecutors obtained witness testimony and wiretapped conversations to make their case, the AP reported.
The pair had a federal court appearance in Las Vegas on Thursday, the AP reported. They did not enter pleas, and the hearing was postponed until Friday, the AP said.
Caracappa's lawyer David Chesnoff, speaking Thursday outside the court, said the government was using "organized crime figures who are trying to save their lives" to build their case. "The government is relying on the words of rats," he said in an AP report.
Fracas over boiled egg lands Bobby Fischer in solitary
Updated: 11:37 a.m. ET March 7, 2005
TOKYO - Chess grand master Bobby Fischer has been placed in solitary confinement at a Japanese immigration detention center for four days after a fracas with guards at breakfast, his fiancee and ex-bodyguard said on Monday.
The former world chess champion is fighting deportation from Japan to the United States, where he is wanted for violating sanctions against Yugoslavia by playing a chess match there in 1992. He has been in custody in Japan since he was arrested last July for traveling on an invalid U.S. passport.
Fischer’s fiancee, Miyoko Watai, a four-time Japan women’s chess champion who last year announced plans to marry Fischer, said he told her during a meeting on Monday morning that he had been in solitary confinement from last Wednesday to Sunday morning at the detention center in Ushiku, northeast of Tokyo.
‘A bit of trouble with some of the staff’
“There was a bit of trouble with some of the staff,” Watai said at a news conference.
Watai said Fischer became involved in a dispute with guards when he asked for an additional boiled egg at breakfast. The dispute escalated to a scuffle, leading Fischer to be placed in solitary confinement.
“Both psychologically and mentally, he is reaching his limits,” she said.
An official at the detention center declined to comment, citing privacy and security reasons.
Watai and other Fischer supporters, including a longtime friend who came to Japan last week in hopes of taking Fischer back to Iceland, said last week that they and Fischer’s lawyers had been prevented from meeting with him since Wednesday.
Iceland, the site of the match where Fischer won the world chess title in 1972 in a classic Cold War encounter with Soviet champion Boris Spassky, offered Fischer a home late last year.
In February, it agreed to issue him a special passport that would allow him to travel through 15 West European countries in what is known as the Schengen Zone, thereby avoiding deportation.
Icelandic passport awaits at embassy
Icelandic Ambassador to Japan Thordur Oskarsson said that the passport has been issued and is being held at the embassy in Tokyo pending Fischer’s release.
“Our instruction is only to release it to him when the Japanese authorities release him from detention,” he added.
It remained unclear, however, whether Japanese immigration authorities would agree to let Fischer go to Iceland rather than deport him to the United States.
On Friday, Fischer formally applied to Japanese immigration authorities for voluntary departure to Iceland.
“I believe that all the conditions for him to leave for Iceland have now been satisfied,” Masako Suzuki, one of Fischer’s lawyers, said Monday.
Fischer’s longtime Icelandic friend Saemundur Palsson, who met the chess great when he was his bodyguard during the 1972 match, said he was unhappy with Japan’s handling of the case.
“I am very disappointed in the Japanese people for taking part in this because I thought they were one of the best and most polite people I had ever met,” he said.
In the latest twist in the case, a Japanese newspaper reported Sunday that Fischer might be indicted by U.S. authorities for tax evasion, after which the U.S. government might ask for him to be handed over by Japan.
Fischer’s lawyers declined to comment on the report, saying they still had to verify details.
Kingsland Man Accused Of Setting Up Meth Lab In K-Mart Bathroom
KINGSLAND, Ga. -- A man who created suspicion by collecting items from various department of K-Mart and taking them into the restroom just before closing time Wednesday arrested after police said they found him operating a methamphetamine lab in the bathroom.
According to Kingsland police, store security began watching Eddie Young, 34, when he came back into the store after making a purchase. After seeing Young get a Coleman lantern from sporting goods and various over-the-counter drugs from the pharmacy area, they said he took the items into the store's restroom.
Store employees reportedly went into the bathroom to tell Young the store was closing in a few minutes, they became even more suspicious and notified police.
Finding a powder that tested positive for methamphetamine in the bathroom, Young was arrested for possession of items to manufacture methamphetamines and possession of a controlled substance.
Cafeteria Owner Stops Robber With Fries
AMSTERDAM, Netherlands (AP) - A Dutch cafeteria owner used piping hot french fries to fend off a gun-wielding would-be robber, police in the southern city of Helmond said Friday.
Fries, or "frites," are a national snack in Holland and Belgium, where they are deep-fried in oil and then salted and eaten with mayonnaise and chopped onions.
It was not known if the culprit, whose age was estimated at 16, was burned. He had threatened the owner and his wife with a handgun Thursday night, police said.
"He wanted money," a police report said. "But once he had hot frites coming his way, he decided he had had enough."
The fries were cooling in a pot when the owner threw them at the intruder.
Police described the youth, who is still at large, as "thin, white, and with a plump nose."
Inmate Said Given Laxative As Prank
PARAGOULD, Ark. (AP) - A jailer gave a laxative to an inmate who had requested cold medicine, then taunted the man as he suffered severe diarrhea, authorities said.
Johnnie Dallas Pruett, 27, was fired and charged with battery in the March 1 incident involving 19-year-old Darryl R. Bartlett.
Sheriff's Capt. Jamie Martin said that after Bartlett asked for cold medicine, Pruett brought him three pink pills and a cup of water. The inmate took the pills, and Pruett began laughing and showed him a box of over-the-counter laxative pills.
Bartlett said that after an hour and a half, he developed severe stomach pains, vomited and had severe diarrhea. He said Pruett taunted him throughout the night and asked if he needed a diaper.
The inmate was in jail on a failure-to-appear warrant.
Ind. pet store owner says Satan's image on turtle shellThe Associated Press
Updated: 5:53 p.m. ET March 18, 2005
MICHIGANTOWN, Ind. - Could it be... Satan?
An Indiana pet shop owner says a turtle that was the only animal to survive an October fire has developed an image of Satan’s face on its shell.
Bryan Dora says it looks like the devil wants us to know that he was there.
Dora says he can see a goatee and a pair of pointy horns on the shell of the palm-sized red-eared slider turtle named Lucky.
He says Lucky is healthy and its behavior hasn’t changed.
Investigators could not determine the cause of the fire, which destroyed the A-Dora-ble Pet Shop and several other businesses in Frankfort, about 40 miles northwest of Indianapolis.
Dora has produced a D-V-D of the turtle’s story that he plans to auction on the Internet. He will also offer the winning bidder the chance to buy Lucky off-line.
Terror by tattoo: 2 held in N.Y.
Teen winds up with obscenity on his forehead
NORWICH, N.Y. - A man and a teenager have been charged with forcibly tattooing an obscenity on the forehead of a 17-year-old boy, police said Monday.
Officer Craig Berry declined to describe the tattoo, except to say it was a phrase.
“It’s just ludicrous that someone would do something like this to another person,” Berry said.
Kenneth D. Peer, 23, and a 17-year-old boy were charged with assault and unlawful imprisonment. Police were withholding the name of the 17-year-old, who was charged as a youthful offender, Berry said.
The two were in jail in lieu of $25,000 bail. A court hearing was scheduled for Tuesday.
The victim — whose name also was withheld by police — walked into the police station Friday to file a complaint against his attackers. The victim told officers he had been held down by a man and another teen at a Norwich residence while they forcibly tattooed the vulgarity.
Police have not established a motive for the attack, Berry said.
Berry said the attackers used a homemade tattooing instrument. Berry said it was likely the victim would require plastic surgery or a laser process to remove the ink.
Couldn't find this online anywhere, but I heard about it on the radio this morning.
A 59 year old man in Barrie, Ontario was pulled over for a DUI. After being placed in the backseat of the squad car, he proceeded to vomit, urinate, and then defecate in the backseat. As if this wasn't enough, he put some of his feces in his mouth in an effort to mess up the breathalyzer. It didn't work, he still blew twice the legal limit.
Ms. Wheelchair stripped of title for standing up
APPLETON, Wisconsin (AP) -- Ms. Wheelchair Wisconsin has been stripped of her title because pageant officials say she can stand -- and point to a newspaper picture as proof.
Janeal Lee, who has muscular dystrophy and uses a scooter, was snapped by The Post-Crescent newspaper standing among her high school math students.
"I've been made to feel as if I can't represent the disabled citizens of Wisconsin because I'm not disabled enough," Lee said Thursday.
Lee, 30, of Appleton, had planned to go to the national pageant with her younger sister, who also has muscular dystrophy and won the competition in Minnesota.
Students at Kaukauna High School, where Lee teaches, raised $1,000 for her trip to the national pageant.
The move by the state pageant officials, led by coordinator Gina Hackel, is supported by the national board.
Candidates for the crown have to "mostly be seen in the public using their wheelchairs or scooters," said Judy Hoit, Ms. Wheelchair America's treasurer.
"Otherwise you've got women who are in their wheelchairs all the time and they get offended if they see someone standing up. We can't have title holders out there walking when they're seen in the public."
Hackel said Lee should have been aware of the rules.
The crown now goes to first runner-up Michelle Kearney of Milwaukee, who will travel to New York in July for the national pageant.
Pat Buchanan doused with salad dressing
KALAMAZOO, Michigan (AP) -- Commentator and former presidential candidate Pat Buchanan cut short an appearance after an opponent of his conservative views doused him with salad dressing.
"Stop the bigotry!" the demonstrator shouted as he hurled the liquid Thursday night during the program at Western Michigan University. The incident came just two days after another noted conservative, William Kristol, was struck by a pie during an appearance at a college in Indiana.
After he was hit, Buchanan cut short his question-and-answer session with the audience, saying, "Thank you all for coming, but I'm going to have to get my hair washed."
The demonstrator, identified by authorities as a 24-year-old student at Kalamazoo Valley Community College, was arrested and faces a misdemeanor charge of disturbing the peace. He was released on a $100 cash bond, pending his April 14 arraignment.
"He could have faced a felony assault charge, but Pat Buchanan decided to not press that charge," university spokesman Matt Kurz said.
Buchanan's visit had evoked controversy on campus because it fell on the birthday of the late Mexican-American labor leader Cesar Chavez. Buchanan favors tighter controls on immigration.
Kristol, editor of the influential conservative magazine The Weekly Standard and former chief of staff to Vice President Quayle, was splattered by a student during a speech Tuesday at Earlham College in Richmond, Indiana.
Members of the audience at the Quaker college jeered the student, then applauded as Kristol wiped the pie from his face and said, "Just let me finish this point." Kristol then completed his speech and took questions from the audience.
The student, who was not immediately identified, was suspended and could face expulsion following a disciplinary review, Earlham Provost Len Clark said Wednesday.
Clark also issued a written apology complimenting Kristol for his "graciousness."
Sony aims to beam sights, sounds into brain
LONDON, England (Reuters) -- If you think video games are engrossing now, just wait: PlayStation maker Sony Corp. has been granted a patent for beaming sensory information directly into the brain.
The technique could one day be used to create video games in which you can smell, taste, and touch, or to help people who are blind or deaf.
The U.S. patent, granted to Sony researcher Thomas Dawson, describes a technique for aiming ultrasonic pulses at specific areas of the brain to induce "sensory experiences" such as smells, sounds and images.
"The pulsed ultrasonic signal alters the neural timing in the cortex," the patent states. "No invasive surgery is needed to assist a person, such as a blind person, to view live and/or recorded images or hear sounds."
According to New Scientist magazine, the first to report on the patent, Sony's technique could be an improvement over an existing non-surgical method known as transcranial magnetic stimulation. This activates nerves using rapidly changing magnetic fields, but cannot be focused on small groups of brain cells.
Niels Birbaumer, a neuroscientist at the University of Tuebingen in Germany, told New Scientist he had looked at the Sony patent and "found it plausible." Birbaumer himself has developed a device that enables disabled people to communicate by reading their brain waves.
A Sony Electronics spokeswoman told the magazine that no experiments had been conducted, and that the patent "was based on an inspiration that this may someday be the direction that technology will take us."
The Man Date
New York Times
Jennifer S. Lee
April 10, 2005
THE delicate posturing began with the phone call.
The proposal was that two buddies back in New York City for a holiday break in December meet to visit the Museum of Modern Art after its major renovation.
"He explicitly said, 'I know this is kind of weird, but we should probably go,' " said Matthew Speiser, 25, recalling his conversation with John Putman, 28, a former classmate from Williams College.
The weirdness was apparent once they reached the museum, where they semi-avoided each other as they made their way through the galleries and eschewed any public displays of connoisseurship. "We definitely went out of our way to look at things separately," recalled Mr. Speiser, who has had art-history classes in his time.
"We shuffled. We probably both pretended to know less about the art than we did."
Eager to cut the tension following what they perceived to be a slightly unmanly excursion - two guys looking at art together - they headed directly to a bar. "We couldn't stop talking about the fact that it was ridiculous we had spent the whole day together one on one," said Mr. Speiser, who is straight, as is Mr. Putman. "We were purging ourselves of insecurity."
[There's more, and it's a good read: http://www.nytimes.com/2005/04/10/fashion/10date.html]
You simply cannot make up stuff this funny . . .
Car shopper, 81, hits husband, salesman, car, tree, wall
FORT MYERS, Florida (AP) -- An 81-year-old woman preparing to take a test drive at a car dealership hit her husband, a salesman, a car and a tree before running into a wall.
"She must have panicked," said Joe Sica, sales manager at Honda of Fort Myers.
The new Honda Accord shot backward after Dorothy Byrum got behind the wheel and apparently stepped on the wrong pedal Wednesday.
The open car door hit her 88-year-old husband, Robert, and the salesman. Then the car struck the parked car, the tree and the wall. The air bag deployed, and Byrum was not injured.
Her husband was knocked down but was in good condition the following day. The salesman was released after treatment and is expected to be out of work for about a week, Sica said.
The car was written off.
Umm . . . umm . . . uhh . . .
Sheriff: 9-year-old kills mother, self
(CNN) -- A 9-year-old Alcoa, North Carolina, boy shot and killed his mother before taking his own life, according to the Warren County Sheriff's Department.
Taylor Jones apparently killed his mother, 38-year-old Gloria Pulley, shortly after midnight Saturday morning, the department said. He left a suicide note in which he apologized for her death.
Authorities have not been able to determine a motive.
"They were a very nice family. I never had any problem with none of them," said Warren County Sheriff John Williams, who said he knew the family personally.
Jones is said to have had a good relationship with his family members and friends, Williams said. There was no obvious discord between him and his mother, he said, and it's unknown if he was on any type of medication or if he had any mental or emotional issues.
Williams said family members became worried over the weekend after not seeing Pulley or Jones for more than a day. Pulley's brother and mother, who live nearby, kicked in the front door of the home Saturday and found the two bodies in one of the bedrooms.
"A family gun" was used in the shootings, Williams said, but it's unknown where and how the weapons was stored.
Autopsy results released to law enforcement by the North Carolina Medical Examiner's office confirm the shooting was a murder-suicide, Williams said.
Jones' father, Pulley's ex-husband, lives in Georgia.
Idle question about the story above:
Democrats would have you believe the 9-year old Murder/Suicide issue above was caused by the gun being in the house.
Republicans would have you believe the issue was caused by the divorced husband being in Georgia (instead of with his family) at the time of the murder.
The article implies that some type of medication may be to blame?
Which view holds more water?
I think they're both leaky, the Dem side less so. Broken home contributing to murder/suicide? Get a running start, because that's a real big leap. Gun in the house caused murder/suicide? Another real big leap. Gun not being properly secured contributing to this . . . I'll buy that for a dollar. 9 yr-old playing with it, it accidentally goes off, etc. Very plausible. 9 yr-old a closet wackjob? Unfortunately, in today's age, also plausible . . . but, I would argue, less so based on statements by those who knew him.
Either way, it sucks.
This one is serious, and painful to post, especially considering this is my chapter. Well, actually, it will soon be my chapter only in the past tense, because if even half of this turns out to be true, these guys should have their charter revoked faster than you can say Teddy Kelley.
The text below is a press release from the University of California, Berkeley.
----------------------------------------
UC Berkeley fraternity placed on interim suspension
By Janet Gilmore, Media Relations | 25 April 2005
BERKELEY – University of California, Berkeley, officials announced today (Monday, April 25) that they have charged a campus fraternity with several student conduct violations and placed the chapter on interim suspension following an apparent hazing incident.
Pi Kappa Phi faces campus charges of physical abuse, hazing, use of a weapon and other offenses stemming from an April 8 incident in which a prospective member, or pledge, allegedly was shot at least 30 times with an air gun or BB gun. The pledge was treated at a local hospital for welts and bruises and released.
The interim suspension bars members of the fraternity from engaging in any fraternity activities, strictly limiting their use of the chapter house to residential purposes, such as eating and sleeping.
If the abuse, hazing and weapon charges against the chapter are found to be true, disciplinary action could range from continued restriction of chapter activities, to the university revoking the chapter's recognition as a UC Berkeley fraternity -- an action that could cause the chapter house to close.
The campus Student Judicial Affairs office also continues to investigate possible student conduct charges against individual members of the chapter who were involved in the apparent hazing. Charges against individual students can result in disciplinary action that can range from a warning to, in more serious cases, suspension or expulsion from campus.
Students have a right to a hearing in all student conduct cases. Student conduct cases are separate and distinct from any pending criminal investigation.
Damn. I just read this story on Yahoo news and came here to gauge the reaction. I can't even fathom shooting someone 30 times with a spitball through a straw much less BBs from an air gun. Very disappointing.
This is really making the rounds, too. I've gotten email from two pledge brothers and another guy who wasn't a Pi Kapp but knew and hung out with several of us.
Jim Rome is about to talk about it also
Came across the Michigan board today as well. Really bad news...
http://www.b2g5.com/boards/board.cgi?&user=Mabee
As bad as that is, it's extremely mild compared to the hazing activities I've heard about thru TV and newspaper. And it isn't just restricted to greek organizations - this is happening in the high schools as well.
Absent an authority figure or someone with enough balls to say 'this is enough', it isn't surprising that the relatively benign concept of hazing (in its non-idiot form) can escalate to such levels. It's very Lord of the Flies-ish.
So sayeth the Rage.
Automatic bids won't be limited to six conferences
PHOENIX -- The Bowl Championship Series is opening its automatic bids to all Division I-A conferences starting with the 2007 season, part of a new plan under which the leagues will be judged from top to bottom.
Currently, only the six conferences that comprise the BCS can earn automatic entry into college football's four major bowl games, including the national title game. The previous standard for holding on to that qualification was based on the average BCS standings finish of a conference's top team over a four-year period.
That will still be a factor, but not the only one.
"In addition, we will look at a conference's overall strength," BCS coordinator Kevin Weiberg said Wednesday, the final day of meetings with officials from 11 major college football conferences and Notre Dame's athletic director.
The BCS will also take into account the number of teams in a conference that finish in the BCS top 25 over a four-year period.
In addition, there is a proposed appeals process if a conference doesn't match up with the others under the new formula but still believes it belongs in the BCS.
"We're set through the first two years [2005-06] of the new agreement, with the same six conferences having the automatic-qualification berths," said Weiberg, the Big 12 commissioner. "This evaluation will then occur, and it could change for the final two years of this new agreement."
The BCS signed a four-year deal with Fox to televise the Sugar, Fiesta and Orange bowls from 2007-10 and the national title game from 2007-09. The Rose Bowl has its own television deal with ABC.
Weiberg said the new evaluation system could lead to more -- or less -- automatic bids.
The Big 12, Big Ten, Pac-10, Southeastern, Atlantic Coast and Big East champions have had automatic entry into the Rose, Orange, Sugar and Fiesta bowls since the BCS was implemented in 1998.
Other standards were set to allow teams from outside the BCS conferences to qualify automatically, but not until last year when Utah earned a spot in the Fiesta Bowl had a team from outside one of the big six conferences played in the BCS.
The BCS also decided to expand to five games last year. Starting with the 2006 season, 10 teams will qualify for the BCS, with the top two meeting in a newly created championship game to be played a week after the four major bowls.
The addition of another game and the new evaluation process for automatic entry were prompted by protests from the five lower-revenue conferences -- such as the Mountain West, where Utah plays, and Conference USA -- that the BCS was unfairly shutting out dozens of schools.
Of the original six BCS conferences, the Big East would appear to be most affected by the changes. The league lost Miami and Virginia Tech last season to the ACC; Boston College follows this year. However, the addition of Louisville this year, along with South Florida and Cincinnati, should help the Big East's chances of keeping its elite status.
Weiberg said Louisville, which finished 10th in the BCS standings last year while playing in C-USA, will be included in the Big East's evaluation and should help the league retain its bid.
"The reason for that is that we're trying to get an assessment looking forward of the prospective strength of the conference, even though it will be based on past performance," Weiberg said.
Beginning in 2006, Notre Dame will earn an automatic BCS berth with a top eight ranking in the final standings, Weiberg said. Also, under a new arrangement, Notre Dame is now guaranteed BCS money every season -- even when they don't play in a game.
In the past, Notre Dame would receive upward of $14 million when they played in a BCS game, but nothing if they didn't.
The proposal and others developed in Phoenix are subject to review by an 11-person committee formed by university presidents. Weiberg said that would be done in a teleconference call on May 12.
He said the athletic directors who met in Phoenix will do more teleconferencing and possibly have one more meeting to fine-tune proposals -- especially the makeup of the replacement poll to take the place of The AP poll in the new BCS standings formula -- before the Collegiate Commissioners Association meetings in Denver on June 20.
The new poll will not be unveiled until June at the earliest.
Exploding toads baffle scientists
BERLIN, Germany (AP) -- More than 1,000 toads have puffed up and exploded in a Hamburg pond in recent weeks, and German scientists still have no explanation for what's causing the combustion, an official said.
Both the pond's water and body parts of the toads have been tested, but scientists have been unable to find a bacteria or virus that would cause the toads to swell up and pop, said Janne Kloepper, of the Hamburg-based Institute for Hygiene and the Environment.
"It's absolutely strange," she said. "We have a really unique story here in Hamburg. This phenomenon really doesn't seem to have appeared anywhere before."
The toads at a pond in the upscale neighborhood of Altona have been blowing up since the beginning of the month, filling up like balloons until their stomachs suddenly burst.
"It looks like a scene from a science-fiction movie," Werner Schmolnik, the head of a local environment group, told the Hamburger Abendblatt daily. "The bloated animals suffer for several minutes before they finally die."
Biologists have come up with several theories, but Kloepper said that most have been ruled out.
The pond's water quality is no better or worse than other bodies of water in Hamburg, the toads did not appear to have a disease, and a laboratory in Berlin has ruled out the possibility that it is a fungus that made its way from South America, she said.
She said that tests will continue. In the meantime, city residents have been warned to stay away from the pond.
Re: BCS
Am I the only one who thinks it is totally bogus that the University of the National Broadcasting Company gets paid even if they suck?
Well, so does Indiana!!! I'm just sad that NBC doesn't join the Big 10/11.
Thank you, Professor.
How the heck did the Domers negotiate that deal?
I understand how they weaseled into the first go round...back then they were a decent football team, but they haven't won a BCS game.
Who even remembers the last time they won a bowl game?
Sheesh!
Yes, I would be very glad to have them join the league - but they are afraid. They cannot hang in this league in football, and maybe not in basketball or baseball either. (They'll be fine for women's basketball.)
Don't forget croquet!
ROFL!!! The mob can't get it up . . .
FBI: Male enhancement drugs illegally provided to mob
NEW YORK (CNN) -- Three doctors from the Westchester suburbs of New York City allegedly provided mob figures with erectile dysfunction drugs in exchange for various favors, the FBI said Thursday.
The FBI arrested the doctors -- Arlen Fleisher, Stephen Klass and George Shapiro -- for allegedly illegally providing large quantities of Viagra, Cialis and Levitra as well as other prescription drugs and drug samples to members of the Gambino crime family.
If convicted of illegally supplying the prescription drugs, Fleisher, Klass and Shapiro each could be sentenced to a maximum of 10 years in prison.
According to a criminal complaint filed Thursday by David Kelley, the U.S. Attorney for the Southern District of New York, FBI wiretaps revealed that Fleisher, Klass and Shapiro supplied the drugs for more than two years to Gambino family capo Gregory DePalma and his "crew" in return for various favors.
Those favors included receiving discounted prices for construction and auto repair work, done by Gambino family-controlled businesses; and use of DePalma's table at Rao's Italian restaurant in the Harlem section of New York City, according to the complaint.
The FBI said its investigation included a wiretap and a confidential source.
The bureau said the case against Fleisher, Klass and Shapiro grew out of the FBI and U.S. attorney's crackdown on the Gambino family operations that resulted in a 53-count criminal indictment against 32 members of the family, including acting boss Arnold Squitieri and capo DePalma.
On March 9, 31 of the 32 named in the indictment were arrested, including DePalma.
Man leaps from speeding car in pursuit of a puff
Drunk went out window after cigarette blew away, Ark. police say
FOREMAN, Ark. - A leap of faith proved hazardous for a smoker in need of a cigarette fix after a night on the town.
Jeff Foran suffered trauma to his nose, eyes and chin after jumping from a car traveling 55-60 mph. Authorities said he was trying to retrieve a cigarette blown out of the passenger-side window.
Foran, 38, took the leap Saturday night, state police Trooper Jamie Gravier said.
The driver of the car, Jerry Glenn Nelson, said Foran had asked him earlier in the evening to be a designated driver after a night of drinking.
"Nelson said Foran was smoking a cigarette when it blew out the window and Foran jumped out the window to retrieve the cigarette. Nelson said he was driving between 55 and 60 mph when Foran jumped out," the trooper said.
“Foran did the right thing and asked his buddy to drive him home,” Gravier said. “It was obvious he was extremely intoxicated.”
Gravier added: “If anything could make him stop smoking, this should be it. The man is lucky to be alive.”
From an email sent out by Chud:
Ok, so here's the article from today's Detroit Free
Press.
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Chemicals affect boys' genital size
High levels during moms' pregnancy hurt development, study says
May 27, 2005
BY SETH BORENSTEIN
KNIGHT RIDDER NEWSPAPERS
WASHINGTON -- Baby boys are far more likely to have smaller, less developed genitals if their mothers had high levels of chemicals commonly found in cosmetics, detergents, medicines and plastics, a study released
Friday said.
The higher the levels of the chemical compound phthalates in the mothers during the final months of pregnancy, the less masculine their boys were when
examined by pediatricians, said the study's lead author, Shanna Swan, a professor of reproductive epidemiology at the University of Rochester in New York.
"We were able to show, even with a relatively small sample, that phthalate-exposed boys have an increased
likelihood of a cluster of genital changes," Swan said Thursday.
The infant sons of the high phthalate-level moms had more instances of smaller penises and scrotums and not properly descended testicles, according to the peer-review study published in the journal Environmental Health Perspectives. Boys of highly
exposed moms were four to 10 times more likely to havereduced genital development.
The most glaring difference between exposed boys was in the anogenital distance, the measurement from the genitals to the anus. In males it is twice the size of
females, and a smaller distance has been shown in animal studies to indicate reduced testosterone levels.
Nine of the 10 boys exposed to the highest mix of different phthalates had short anogenital distances.
Scientists are concerned that these boys might go into puberty late, be infertile and contract testicular cancer because that's what rats with similar reduced anogenital distances showed, said Earl Gray, a senior
research biologist at the federal Environmental Protection Agency.
The mothers in the federally funded study -- including those with high phthalate levels --showed similar levels in the range and amounts of the chemicals as the average American, based on previous studies by the
federal Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, said study coauthor Antonia Calafat, the CDC's lead research chemist.
"If I were pregnant, I would try to keep my phthalate levels low," said study coauthor Christine Ternand, a professor of pediatric endocrinology at the University
of Minnesota. "How I would do that would be a tricky thing."
Phthalates are used as plasticizers, solvents, coatings and perfume fixatives. They are in hundreds of products, including food packaging, coatings on
time-released medicines, soap, shampoo, nail polish, hair sprays, detergents, and vinyl floor coverings.
Marian Stanley, a senior director of the American Chemistry Council and spokeswoman for a group of companies that use phthalates, said it was too hard to
come to any conclusion from the Swan study, especially since it involved too few people.
The study, conducted in Minneapolis, St. Paul, Minn., Columbia, Mo., and Los Angeles, examined 85 infant boys and used urine samples taken from their mothersduring the last few months of pregnancy. The National
Institutes of Health and the EPA paid for it.
Veteran pitcher stabbed by shattered bat
NASHVILLE, Tenn. (AP) -- Former major league pitcher Rick Helling of the Nashville Sounds is expected to start next week as scheduled, five days after he was impaled in his non-throwing arm by a piece of broken bat.
Helling, who pitched in the majors for 10 seasons, will start Wednesday against Albuquerque, Sounds spokesman Doug Scopel said Saturday.
Helling was facing New Orleans' Craig Kuzmic in the seventh inning Friday when the bat shattered and a 3-inch piece of wood struck his left forearm, according to Scopel.
Scopel said Helling was taken to a hospital where he was treated and released.
"There was no internal damage," Scopel said. "They stitched him up and released him and he's on target for his next start."
Helling ended up with the victory in the 13-3 win by the Sounds, the Milwaukee Brewers' Triple-A affiliate.
Helling was 90-78 with a 4.77 ERA in 225 starts with Texas, Florida, Arizona and Baltimore. Helling has not pitched in the major leagues since 2003.
I am an expert on toad explosions, and can provide the scientific explanation for this phenomenon posted some time back. Certain bird species find toad livers tasty morsels, and will attack unsuspecting toad prey. The bird will literally rip the liver from the defenseless toad's chest. A toad's instinctive response is to puff up to appear larger and more magnificent, to deter further attack. Unfortunately, in this instance the gaping hole provides an exit for organs that are shifted to the front of the chest by the act of puffing up. The toad 'explodes', with its entrails, stomach, and other organs shooting out of its chest, generally accompanied by the universal 'Doh!' expletive on the part of the toad.
ROFL!!! No need to proofread the title of the story, guys . . .
Psychiatrists Asses Homolka
Reuters
Thursday, June 2, 2005
JOLIETTE, Quebec - Psychiatrists weighed into the debate about the mental state of a notorious Canadian sex killer on Friday as authorities fought to keep her under close watch after she ends her sentence for manslaughter.
___________________________________
See photos of Karla's court hearing
Poll: Do you think she'll reoffend?
What restrictions do you think Karla Homolka should face? Let us know
___________________________________
A psychiatrist called by lawyers for KARLA HOMOLKA played down the chance that the 35-year-old might reoffend.
Other doctors have said that HOMOLKA could still be a risk to the public, citing her role in violent sex crimes in the 1990s that horrified Canada.
HOMOLKA was jailed for kidnapping, sexually assaulting, torturing, and killing two teenage girls, crimes carried out with her then-husband PAUL BERNARDO.
She will be released from prison in Joliette, Quebec, in the next few weeks after 12 years behind bars. The manslaughter sentence, which outraged many Canadians, was the result of a plea bargain deal with prosecutors in return for her testimony against BERNARDO.
He is serving a life sentence for murder.
Authorities in Ontario, where HOMOLKA and BERNARDO committed their crimes, and in Quebec, where she is finishing her sentence, want the right to keep HOMOLKA under close watch after she leaves prison.
The hearing started on Thursday and had initially been expected to last just one day.
ROFL!!! The dangers inherent in lighting up on the shitter ...
Lawsuit claims exploding toilet burned man
MORGANTOWN, West Virginia (AP) -- A man who says he was severely burned when a portable toilet exploded after he sat down and lit a cigarette is suing a general contractor and a coal company, accusing them of negligence.
John Jenkins, 53, and his wife, Ramona Jenkins, 35, of Brave, Pennsylvania, filed the suite Tuesday in county circuit court seeking $10 million in damages from Chisler Inc. and Eastern Associated Coal Corp.
The lawsuit claims Jenkins' face, neck, arms, torso and legs were severely burned last July after the cigarette ignited methane gas leaking from a pipe underneath the toilet unit.
"When I struck the lighter, the whole thing just detonated -- the whole top blew off," said Jenkins, a methane power plant operator with North West Fuels Development Inc. "I can't tell you if it blew me out the door or if I jumped out."
Eastern Associated owns the Blacksville property where the explosion occurred. Jenkins alleges that heavy equipment from Chisler Inc. ran over the pipelines before the explosion, causing the methane gas leak.
A call to the Charleston office of Peabody Energy, the parent company of Eastern Associated Coal, was not returned.
A man who answered the phone at Chisler's office in Fairview said the company would have no comment.
Umm . . . uhh . . . wtf?!?
Man with bloody chain saw let into United States
BOSTON, Massachusetts (AP) -- On April 25, Gregory Despres arrived at the U.S.-Canadian border crossing at Calais, Maine, carrying a homemade sword, a hatchet, a knife, brass knuckles and a chain saw stained with what appeared to be blood.
U.S. customs agents confiscated the weapons and fingerprinted Despres. Then they let him into the United States.
The following day, a gruesome scene was discovered in Despres' hometown of Minto, New Brunswick: The decapitated body of a 74-year-old country musician named Frederick Fulton was found on Fulton's kitchen floor. His head was in a pillowcase under a kitchen table. His common-law wife was discovered stabbed to death in a bedroom.
Despres, 22, immediately became a suspect because of a history of violence between him and his neighbors, and he was arrested April 27 after police in Massachusetts saw him wandering down a highway in a sweat shirt with red and brown stains. He is now in jail in Massachusetts on murder charges, awaiting an extradition hearing next month.
Blood, rust or red paint
At a time when the United States is tightening its borders, how could a man toting what appeared to be a bloody chain saw be allowed into the country?
Bill Anthony, a spokesman for U.S. Customs and Border Protection, said the Canada-born Despres could not be detained because he is a naturalized U.S. citizen and was not wanted on any criminal charges on the day in question.
Anthony said Despres was questioned for two hours before he was released. During that time, he said, customs agents employed "every conceivable method" to check for warrants or see if Despres had broken any laws in trying to re-enter the country.
"Nobody asked us to detain him," Anthony said. "Being bizarre is not a reason to keep somebody out of this country or lock them up. ... We are governed by laws and regulations, and he did not violate any regulations."
Anthony conceded it "sounds stupid" that a man wielding what appeared to be a bloody chain saw could not be detained. But he added: "Our people don't have a crime lab up there. They can't look at a chain saw and decide if it's blood or rust or red paint."
Sgt. Gary Cameron of the Royal Canadian Mounted Police would not comment on whether it was, in fact, blood on the chain saw.
On the same day Despres crossed the border, he was due in a Canadian court to be sentenced on charges he assaulted and threatened to kill Fulton's son-in-law, Frederick Mowat, last August.
Mowat told police Despres had been bothering his father-in-law for the past month. When Mowat confronted him, Despres allegedly pulled a knife, pointed it at Mowat's chest and said he was "going to get you all."
Police believe the dispute between the neighbors boiled over in the early-morning hours of April 24, when Despres allegedly broke into Fulton's home and stabbed to death the musician and 70-year-old Veronica Decarie.
Fulton's daughter found her father's body two days later. His car was later found in a gravel pit on a highway leading to the U.S. border. Despres hitchhiked to the border crossing.
After the bodies were found on the afternoon of April 26, police set up roadblocks and sent out a bulletin that identified Despres as a "person of interest" in the slayings, according to the Royal Canadian Mounted Police.
The bulletin caught the eye of a Quincy police dispatcher because it gave the suspect's Massachusetts driver's license number, missing a character. The dispatcher plugged in numbers and letters until she found a last known address for Despres in Mattapoisett. She alerted police in that town, and an officer quickly spotted Despres.
In state court the next day, Despres told a judge that he is affiliated with NASA and was on his way to a Marine Corps base in Kansas at the time of his arrest.
After the case was transferred to federal court, Despres' attorney, Michael Andrews, questioned whether his client is mentally competent.
Fulton's friends in Minto, a village of 2,700 people, told the New Brunswick Telegraph-Journal that he was a popular musician, a guitarist known as the "Chet Atkins of Minto" and a 2001 inductee in the Minto Country Music Wall of Fame.
I don't think I really need to comment on this one . . . it pretty much speaks for itself.
Kittens use fax as toilet, spark house fire
Cats run to safety, but house in Japan suffers extensive damage
TOKYO - Two kittens picked the wrong place to relieve themselves when they urinated on a fax machine, sparking a fire that extensively damaged their Japanese owner’s house.
Investigators in the western city of Kobe have concluded that the fire in January was caused by a spark generated when the urine soaked the machine’s electrical printing mechanism.
The fire damaged the kitchen and living room before it was put out by the house’s owner, who was treated for mild smoke inhalation, said Masahito Oyabu, a fireman at the Nagata fire station in central Kobe.
The kittens quickly ran to safety, he added.
“If you have a cat, or a dog for that matter, be careful where they urinate,” Oyabu said. “Especially keep them away from electrical appliances and wires.”
And the hits just keep on comin' . . .
Police: Airborne car lands on sleeping man
PINE BLUFF, Arkansas (AP) -- An airborne car crashed through the wall of a man's bedroom, landing on him as he slept.
"It hit the outside bedroom wall, continued through the bedroom, over the bed and partially exited through the side wall," police Lt. Bob Rawlinson said. "The guy was pinned under the car and rolled up in the mattress."
Ricky May suffered burns and injuries to one eye and his hand.
The driver of the car, Devlon Chandler, had fallen asleep at the wheel as he and his wife, Arninitra, were returning home from a casino in Greenville, Mississippi, police said.
Their car left the road, crossed a grassy area, clipped a utility pole, ruptured a gas main and went airborne before crashing into May's house, about 500 feet from the road.
"The car was totally inside the house and a little bit sticking out through the other side," Rawlinson said.
Rawlinson said there have been several fatal accidents within the last year at the same spot because of a long curve in the highway. He said alcohol was not a factor in the accident.
May, 42, was taken to the University of Arkansas for Medical Sciences to treatment of his eye injury, and he may have to have one finger amputated, police said. Rawlinson said Monday that May had been upgraded from serious condition.
Devlon Chandler, 34, also of Pine Bluff, was ticketed for failing to maintain control of a motor vehicle, driving on a suspended license and not having proof of insurance, police said.
Ok, how GIANT of an IDIOT do you have to be to think a popsicle won't melt all to hell in JUNE heat?!?
Disaster on a stick
Snapple’s attempt at popsicle world record turns into gooey fiasco
NEW YORK - An attempt to erect the world’s largest popsicle in a city square ended with a scene straight out of a disaster film — but much stickier.
The 25-foot-tall, 17½-ton treat of frozen Snapple juice melted faster than expected Tuesday, flooding Union Square in downtown Manhattan with kiwi-strawberry-flavored fluid that sent pedestrians scurrying for higher ground.
Firefighters closed off several streets and used hoses to wash away the sugary goo.
Snapple had been trying to promote a new line of frozen treats by setting a record for the world’s largest popsicle, but called off the stunt before it was pulled fully upright by a construction crane. Authorities said they were worried the thing would collapse in the 80-degree, first-day-of-summer heat.
“What was unsettling was that the fluid just kept coming,” Stuart Claxton of the Guinness Book of World Records told the Daily News. “It was quite a lot of fluid. On a hot day like this, you have to move fast.”
Snapple official Lauren Radcliffe said the company was unlikely to make a second attempt to break the record, set by a 21-foot ice pop in Holland in 1997.
The giant ice pop was supposed to have been able to withstand the heat for some time, (yea, riiiiiight) and organizers weren’t sure why it didn’t. It had been made in Edison, N.J., and hauled to New York by freezer truck in the morning.
Idiocy apparently knows no bounds.
New tool in anti-porn drive: forced sit-ups
Police in India try to shame people caught watching smutty movies
NEW DELHI - Indian police forced around 200 people caught watching pornography to do sit-ups in public to shame them and keep them away from theaters that illegally screen smutty movies.
The Hindustan Times reported on Monday that police stopped the screening of a pornographic movie at a cinema in Balasore district in the eastern state of Orissa and made audience members — some as young as 17 — do 10 sit-ups each at a public square, watched by onlookers.
The police made the all-male group vow not to watch pornography again. To make matters worse for the embarrassed teenagers who were caught, police called their parents to watch them doing sit-ups.
Beam yourself up, Scotty
James Doohan, 'Star Trek's' Scotty, dead
LOS ANGELES, California (AP) -- James Doohan, the burly chief engineer of the Starship Enterprise in the original "Star Trek" TV series and motion pictures who responded to the apocryphal command "Beam me up, Scotty," died early Wednesday. He was 85.
Doohan died at 5:30 a.m. (1330 GMT) at his Redmond, Washington, home with his wife of 28 years, Wende, at his side, Los Angeles agent and longtime friend Steve Stevens said. The cause of death was pneumonia and Alzheimer's disease, he said.
The Canadian-born Doohan fought in World War II and was wounded during the D-Day invasion, according to the StarTrek.com Web site. He was enjoying a busy career as a character actor when he auditioned for a role as an engineer in a new space adventure on NBC in 1966. A master of dialects from his early years in radio, he tried seven different accents.
"The producers asked me which one I preferred," Doohan recalled 30 years later. "I believed the Scot voice was the most commanding. So I told them, 'If this character is going to be an engineer, you'd better make him a Scotsman.' "
The series, which starred William Shatner as Capt. James T. Kirk and Leonard Nimoy as the enigmatic Mr. Spock, attracted an enthusiastic following of science fiction fans, especially among teenagers and children, but not enough ratings power. NBC canceled it after three seasons.
When the series ended in 1969, Doohan found himself typecast as Montgomery Scott, the canny engineer with a burr in his voice. In 1973, he complained to his dentist, who advised him: "Jimmy, you're going to be Scotty long after you're dead. If I were you, I'd go with the flow."
"I took his advice," said Doohan, "and since then everything's been just lovely."
"Star Trek" continued in syndication both in the United States and abroad, and its following grew larger and more dedicated. In his later years, Doohan attended 40 "Trekkie" gatherings around the country and lectured at colleges.
The huge success of George Lucas' "Star Wars" in 1977 prompted Paramount Pictures, which had produced "Star Trek" for television, to plan a movie based on the series. The studio brought back the TV cast and hired director Robert Wise. "Star Trek: The Motion Picture" was successful enough to spawn five sequels with the cast of the original TV show; other films, featuring cast members of "Star Trek: The Next Generation," have followed.
The powerfully built Doohan spoke frankly in 1998 about his employer and his TV commander.
"I started out in the series at basic minimum -- plus 10 percent for my agent. That was added a little bit in the second year. When we finally got to our third year, Paramount told us we'd get second-year pay! That's how much they loved us."
He accused Shatner of hogging the camera, adding: "I like Captain Kirk, but I sure don't like Bill. He's so insecure that all he can think about is himself."
James Montgomery Doohan was born March 3, 1920, in Vancouver, British Columbia, youngest of four children of William Doohan, a pharmacist, veterinarian and dentist, and his wife Sarah. As he wrote in his autobiography, "Beam Me Up, Scotty," his father was a drunk who made life miserable for his wife and children.
At 19, James escaped the turmoil at home by joining the Canadian army, becoming a lieutenant in artillery. He was among the Canadian forces that landed on Juno Beach on D-Day. "The sea was rough," he recalled. "We were more afraid of drowning than the Germans."
The Canadians crossed a minefield laid for tanks; the soldiers weren't heavy enough to detonate the bombs. At 11:30 that night, he was machine-gunned, taking six hits: one that took off his middle right finger (he managed to hide the missing finger on screen), four in his leg and one in the chest. The chest bullet was stopped by his silver cigarette case.
After the war Doohan on a whim enrolled in a drama class in Toronto. He showed promise and won a two-year scholarship to New York's famed Neighborhood Playhouse, where fellow students included Leslie Nielsen, Tony Randall and Richard Boone.
His commanding presence and booming voice brought him work as a character actor in films and television, both in Canada and the United States.
Besides "Star Trek," Doohan was in another space adventure, "Space Command," in 1953, as well as a late-'70s children's series, "Jason of Star Command."
Doohan's first marriage to Judy Doohan produced four children. He had two children by his second marriage to Anita Yagel. Both marriages ended in divorce. In 1974 he married Wende Braunberger, and their children were Eric, Thomas and Sarah, who was born in 2000, when Doohan was 80.
In a 1998 interview, Doohan was asked if he ever got tired of hearing the line "Beam me up, Scotty" -- a line that, reportedly, was never actually spoken on the TV show.
"I'm not tired of it at all," he replied. "Good gracious, it's been said to me for just about 31 years. It's been said to me at 70 miles an hour across four lanes on the freeway. I hear it from just about everybody. It's been fun."
WOW . . . 40 goats and 20 cows!!
Goats, cows offered for Chelsea
NAIROBI, Kenya (AP) -- A Kenyan says he offered Bill Clinton 40 goats and 20 cows for his daughter's hand in marriage five years ago -- and is still waiting for an answer.
Godwin Kipkemoi Chepkurgor told the East Africa Standard newspaper last week that he wrote to Clinton asking for Chelsea's hand in 2000 during the then-president's visit to Kenya.
Chepkurgor, a 36-year-old elected city councilor in Nakuru, recounted writing to the U.S president through the Kenyan government.
He described his plans for a grand wedding presided over by South African Nobel Peace Prize winner Archbishop Desmond Tutu. He named then-President Daniel arap Moi and the president of his university as references.
"Had I succeeded in wooing Chelsea, I would have had a grand wedding," he told the Standard in an interview published Friday during Clinton's recent visit to Kenya.
Chepkurgor said his letter praised Clinton's leadership and commended his wife, Senator Hillary Rodham Clinton, for standing by her husband "like an African woman" in the face of the Monica Lewinsky scandal.
The electrical engineering graduate said he promised to pay his would-be father-in-law 20 cows and 40 goats in dowry for his only daughter in accordance with African tradition.
But he said the letter prompted security checks -- on him, his family and his classmates, and he was summoned to the Foreign Ministry in Nairobi for a meeting that he missed because of his graduation from university.
A National Security Intelligence Service officer told the Standard the letter probably never made it out of the office.
"We gathered that this man was a teetotaler and a staunch Christian who seemed to have been struck by Chelsea, and I thought maybe he just took the joke too far," he said.
Chepkurgor vowed to remain single until he gets an answer to his proposal to marry Chelsea, 25.
This one is great!!!
Teen vomits on teacher, told to clean police cars
Judge tells boy his actions ‘were an assault upon the dignity of all teachers’
OLATHE, Kan. - A high school student convicted of battery for vomiting on his Spanish teacher has been ordered to spend the next four months cleaning up after people who throw up in police cars.
Johnson County Magistrate Judge Michael Farley said during the sentencing Tuesday that he considered the boy’s actions “an assault upon the dignity of all teachers.”
The teen, now 17, vomited on teacher David Young as he turned in his textbook on the last day of classes at Olathe Northwest High School. His attorney, Brian Costello, said the student vomited because he was nervous about his final exams.
But two other students testified that the teen said he threw up intentionally. One girl said he told her in advance that he planned to throw up on Young on the last day of school. The girl wasn’t in class when the teen threw up, but she testified that the boy later told her, “You missed it. I did it.”
Young said the student, who was failing his class, made no effort to avoid throwing up on him. “I was just sort of stunned,” he said.
Germans know how to parrrr-tay!
Berlin readies giant brothel for 2006 World Cup
BERLIN (Reuters) - A German company is looking to cash in on an expected boom in the sex trade during next year's soccer World Cup with a 60-room brothel a walk away from Berlin's Olympic Stadium, German media reported on Friday.
Named after the virgin huntress of Greek mythology, the "Artemis" complex is due to open for business in September with whirlpool, sauna, cinema, buffet restaurant and a staff of 100 prostitutes, mass circulation daily Bild reported.
"This is no flash rip-off joint where clients are taken for a ride," a spokesman for the Artemis GmbH investment company behind the project, told the newspaper.
Prostitution is legal in Germany in designated areas. Dortmund, one of 11 other cities to host World Cup matches, has said it will install drive-in wooden "sex garages" in time for the tournament in a bid to keep the trade off the streets.
But the Artemis project does not enjoy the backing of Berlin mayor Klaus Wowereit. "We have no need for that," he told Bild.
Note to reader: The brothel's owners are somewhat shaky on their mythology. While it sounds pleasingly exotic to name the place after the hunting goddess, they seem to forget that she was also famed for her virginity. In fact, Artemis and her dad, Zeus, protected her chastity quite ferociously. Just ask Actaeon, who happened to glance a little too long (and longingly) at a naked Artemis bathing in a lake. Artemis turned him into a stag and set his own hounds upon him, resulting in a grisly death. That presumably wouldn't be good for business.
Ok, I thought I was bad for chopping up all my Michigan stuff after we lost to Texas in last year's Rose Bowl (it's since all been replaced). But GOOD LORD . . . this guy is waaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyy out there, like orbiting Neptune!!
Wife wanted to cuddle; hubby wanted to watch sports
PANAMA CITY, Fla. -- A man who got angry with his wife because she wanted to cuddle after sex when what he really wanted to do was watch sports on television was sentenced to death for killing her with a claw hammer.
Christopher Offord, 30, was sentenced Wednesday by Circuit Judge Dedee Costello, who said the brutality of the crime outweighed any mental problems Offord may have had.
"The defendant struck his wife approximately 70 individual blows after spending a happy interlude with her," the judge said. "Her desire to cuddle after sex does not justify the extremely violent, brutal response of the defendant."
Offord pleaded guilty to first-degree murder in the 2004 slaying of Dana Noser, 40, at his apartment.
He confessed to a bartender at a sports bar before his arrest. He told investigators that his wife had been nagging him to come back to bed.
Offord did not speak in court but said in a jailhouse interview in June: "I figured I killed her so I deserve to die." ya think??
What has this world come too? I mean, man, people have got their priorities mixed up. Cuddle after sex instead of sports! Come on!
She deserved the claw hammer!
Uhh . . .
Man dies after online game marathon
SEOUL, South Korea (Reuters) -- A South Korean man who played computer games for 50 hours almost non-stop died of heart failure minutes after finishing his mammoth session in an Internet cafe, authorities said on Tuesday.
The 28-year-old man, identified only by his family name Lee, had been playing online battle simulation games at the cybercafe in the southeastern city of Taegu, police said.
Lee had planted himself in front of a computer monitor to play on-line games on August 3. He only left the spot over the next three days to go to the toilet and take brief naps on a makeshift bed, they said.
"We presume the cause of death was heart failure stemming from exhaustion," a Taegu provincial police official said by telephone.
Lee had recently quit his job to spend more time playing games, the daily JoongAng Ilbo reported after interviewing former work colleagues and staff at the Internet cafe.
After he failed to return home, Lee's mother asked his former colleagues to find him. When they reached the cafe, Lee said he would finish the game and then go home, the paper reported.
He died a few minutes later, it said.
South Korea, one of the most wired countries in the world, has a large and highly developed game industry.
This is hilarious!!!
Panic ensues in rush for cheap laptops
RICHMOND, Virginia (AP) -- A rush to purchase $50 used laptops turned into a violent stampede Tuesday, with people getting thrown to the pavement, beaten with a folding chair and nearly driven over. One woman went so far to wet herself rather than surrender her place in line.
"This is total, total chaos," said Latoya Jones, 19, who lost one of her flip-flops in the ordeal and later limped around on the sizzling blacktop with one foot bare.
More than 1,000 people turned out at the Richmond International Raceway in hopes of getting their hands on one of the 4-year-old Apple iBooks, which retail for between $999 and $1,299. The Henrico County school system was selling 1,000 of the computers to county residents.
Officials opened the gates at 7 a.m., but some already had been waiting for hours in line. When the gates opened, it became a terrifying mob scene.
People threw themselves forward, screaming and pushing each other. A little girl's stroller was crushed in the stampede. Witnesses said an elderly man was thrown to the pavement, and someone in a car tried to drive his way through the crowd.
Police would not immediately comment on the number of or extent of injuries, though witnesses said they mostly had scrapes and bruises.
"It's rather strange that we would have such a tremendous response for the purchase of a laptop computer -- and laptop computers that probably have less-than- desirable attributes," said Paul Proto, director of general services for Henrico County. "But I think that people tend to get caught up in the excitement of the event -- it almost has an entertainment value."
Blandine Alexander, 33, said one woman standing in front of her was so desperate to retain her place in line that she urinated on herself.
"I've never been in something like that before, and I never again will," said Alexander, who brought her 14-year-old twin boys to the complex at 4:30 a.m. to wait in line. "No matter what the kids want, I already told them I'm not doing that again."
Jesse Sandler said he was one of the people pushing forward, using a folding chair he had brought with him to beat back people who tried to cut in front of him.
"I took my chair here and I threw it over my shoulder and I went, 'Bam,"' the 20-year-old said nonchalantly, his eyes glued to the screen of his new iBook, as he tapped away on the keyboard at a testing station.
"They were getting in front of me and I was there a lot earlier than them, so I thought that it was just," he said.
At least America hasn't completely cornered the market on dumbasses . . .
Woman torches house trying to kill spiders
34-year-old German weaves web of destruction with hairspray, lighter
BERLIN - A German woman laid waste to her family home by setting fire to it as she tried to kill spiders in a garage with a can of hairspray and a cigarette lighter.
Police in the western town of Zuelpich said that when the aerosol failed to finish them off, the 34-year-old woman tried to burn them with the lighter. However, this set the area she had just sprayed on fire and the blaze spread to a hedge.
“It was a series of unfortunate events which led to the damage,” a police spokesman said on Thursday.
“She tried to put the fire out with a garden hose, but couldn’t. Instead her semi-detached house next to the hedge caught fire. It’s now uninhabitable.”
Firefighters managed to extinguish the blaze and save the neighboring house, which sustained broken windows and some charring. The spokesman estimated the total cost of the damage at well over $125,000. No one was hurt.
“The family have had to look for somewhere else to stay,” he said. “The spiders are gone though -- that problem was solved.”
I feel sorry for the three dumb bastards she beat out. I see a lifetime of jokes and insults in their future.
She's the homecoming king
Hood College lesbian defeats three men for honor
FREDERICK, Maryland (AP) -- Hood College is reviewing its homecoming rules after a lesbian was crowned king, a college official said.
Jennifer Jones, the 21-year-old senior who beat out three men for the honor, said the crowning was a positive step for the private liberal arts college.
"It is cool that Hood allows people to be themselves," Jones told The Frederick News-Post. "If people didn't want me to be king, they wouldn't have nominated me and voted for me."
Jones, of Newark, Delaware, received 64 of 169 votes cast for king last month.
More than two weeks after Jones was crowned, criticism and praise were still rippling through the 2,100-student campus in western Maryland.
"She is not a man," said Singleton Newman, a 22-year-old senior who was nominated for queen. "It is a gender issue, and she is a woman."
Santo Provenzano, 21, who competed for king, said Jones' selection made the event seem like a joke. "It discourages guys from wanting to take part in the future," he said.
Donald Miller, Hood's student activities director, said all homecoming events will be reviewed and possibly changed. "We will look at what students want Hood's homecoming to be," he said.
It was only the second annual homecoming for the school. Men started attending Hood in 1971 but the school didn't become fully coeducational until 2003 when men were permitted to live on campus for the first time.
Jones tried to run for homecoming prince last year, but a student committee wouldn't let her on the ballot even though she had gathered the required number of signatures on nominating petitions.
Miller said a rule change this year abolished the petitions and required that candidates be nominated by student ballots.
+1 bonus points for creativity, -22 points for stupidity.
Ken Lay Claims Amnesia After Coconut Fell on His Head
Controversial 'Gilligan Defense' makes debut at Enron trial
March 14, 2006 - In what many experts are calling a high-stakes legal strategy, former Enron CEO Ken Lay testified at his trial today that a coconut fell on his head while he was running the Texas energy company, causing amnesia that wiped out all memory of anything that happened during his tenure there.
While most trial watchers expected Lay's defense team to use inventive tactics to secure an acquittal for the embattled former CEO, few expected the coconut-falling-on-head explanation for Lay's claim that he was out of the loop during the entirety of Enron's multibillion-dollar fall from grace.
As the trial resumed this morning, Lay's defense attorney used a diagram, a pointer and a coconut itself to dramatize the incident in what legal experts are already calling "The Gilligan Defense."
"As you can see, a coconut that Lay kept on a high shelf of his office bookcase rolled off the shelf, landing squarely on his head, and causing total amnesia," Lay's attorney told a stunned courtroom.
Moments after the coconut landed on the former CEO's head, Lay claimed that Andrew Fastow, Enron's former chief financial officer, ran into Lay's office, concerned, and asked, "Are you all right, little buddy?"
But under cross examination, Lay's story appeared to fray somewhat, especially when the prosecutor asked, "If you had total amnesia, how could you remember that a coconut fell on your head?"
"Oops," Lay replied.
Elsewhere, President Bush expressed confidence about Iraq's future, and added that he thought that Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston would get back together.
Is this an Onion article? And I think Chewbacca hit him with the coconut.
http://msnbc.msn.com/id/11824612/site/newsweek/
ROFL!!! How'd you like to be their neighbors?!?
Till death do us part? Bring it on!
Man, wife hospitalized after firing guns, hurling knives, bombs at each other
MEXICO CITY - A Mexican husband and wife were recovering separately after a marital spat got out of control and saw them firing guns, throwing knives and hurling homemade bombs, Mexican daily Milenio said Monday.
In scenes taken straight out of the hit romantic comedy “Mr. and Mrs. Smith,” starring Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie, Juan Espinosa and Irma Contreras fought until their house blew up in a homemade gasoline bomb explosion, Milenio said.
Police called to the home in the indigenous Mayan Indian town of Oxkutzcab in the southeastern state of Yucatan arrested Espinosa. Contreras was taken to hospital with third-degree burns.
A local police official confirmed the report but declined to provide further information.
In the violence-filled movie about the fictional Smiths, Pitt and Jolie play married assassins ordered to kill each other.
Espinosa told reporters he was glad his wife had suffered burns, while Contreras said she was only sorry she had not “hacked off his manhood” during the fight.
Does your wife love you this much?
2-2006420225%2C00.html,http://www.thesun.co.uk/article/0,,2-2006420225,00.html
Grieving wife sliced off willy
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September 12, 2006
A WIFE aged 65 chopped off her dead husband’s willy in hospital — so she could keep it in a pickling jar as a souvenir.
Uta Schneider used a butcher’s knife to hack off the “treasured” manhood. She wrapped it in foil and put it in a lunchbox — next to gherkins.
But she was spotted by a nurse and arrested in Stuttgart, Germany. She is accused of mutilation.
Uta was wed to Heinrich, 68, for 35 years.
She told police: “It was his best asset and gave me so much pleasure.
“I wanted to pickle it for eternity — he would have wanted it. We called it his joystick. I wanted it to remember him by.”
Man charged with stalking, threatening Michigan coach
ANN ARBOR, Mich. -- University of Michigan police have arrested a 23-year-old man they say stalked and sent threatening e-mails to football coach Lloyd Carr.
Tobi Akinmusuru, of Ann Arbor, was arrested Tuesday, the same day Carr and other coaching staff members received threatening, harassing and obscene e-mail, campus police said.
Akinmusuru was arraigned Thursday on charges of using a computer in a crime, malicious use of telecommunications and malicious annoyance by writing, campus police spokeswoman Diane Brown said. He faces up to one year in jail if convicted.
Akinmusuru's bail was set at $10,000, and he was scheduled for a preliminary hearing Friday in 15th District Court, Brown said. He remained in the Washtenaw County jail Thursday afternoon, and it was unknown if he had a lawyer.
Akinmusuru is not a student or former student at the school, Brown said.
Officers first had contact with Akinmusuru on Monday when he was seen looking into car windows at the athletic department's Schembechler Hall, Brown said.
Police also learned that Akinmusuru was standing outside the Michigan Union on Tuesday with an aluminum baseball bat and making threats that referred to Carr and others in the football program, Brown said.
Fess up Rage. You're bothered by the fact this dude is being more proactive than you in trying to get rid of Carr, aren't you?
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